Some individuals are born with a disability, others develop a disability, illness or condition, and some acquire a disability through a physical trauma that might occur in a work accident, vehicle crash, sports activity or while serving in the military. Some are age-related disabilities, affecting us because medical advances allow us to live longer.

Most Americans expect to be able to decide how and where they live, work, shop, dine, vote, socialize and recreate, and get around (transportation). They consider this “an inalienable right” – the freedom and choice to do the things they want to do, when and where they wish.

When describing someone using people-first language, one puts the person before the trait. Thus we say “person with a disability,” rather than “disabled person.” (The word “handicapped” is antiquated and offensive to most people; it derives from 1800s England when people with disabilities would beg in the streets with their “cap in hand.”)

Language is always evolving. The words we choose and use can, and do, affect societal and media attitudes. Even well-meaning people who don’t believe they are prejudiced can subtly send a negative message with the language they use.

For example, if someone were to say, “I never think of you as disabled,” the underlying meaning is, “You don’t seem disabled… so long as you continue to do well,” or “You do a good job fitting in with us,” or “you hide it well.” Why is this stigmatizing, or perpetuating a negative attitude? Because the implication is that a person with a disability is different than “the rest of us” and should work to fit in or hide their disability.

Avoid using words like “victim” or “sufferer”; it presumes the person is in agony or perpetually helpless. Rather, choose words like “stroke survivor” or “person with MS.”

Sometimes a stigma, or negative perspective, forms around a segment of the population. It is usually based on a civil rights issue, such as the color of one’s skin, or their gender or sexual orientation. Immigration reform is fighting a stigma against undocumented workers who were not born in this country. And the disability community continues to struggle with the stigma that comes from societal or cultural misunderstanding or fear of disability.

Many people talk freely about having limitations around certain mental or physical functions but do not identify themselves as a “person with a disability.” This may be due to fear of discrimination or the social stigma or cultural attitudes that have long prevailed against people who are “different” than the majority for one reason or another.